GlueRatGlobal University — Est. Provisionally

College
of the Rats

Real tutorials on Linux audio, MIDI, synth building, pirate radio infrastructure and the emerging field of making things work when they really shouldn't. Unaccredited. Unapologetic. Occasionally correct.

*Qualifications not recognised by any accredited institution, jurisdiction, or family member.

College of the Rats
GRG University
Provisional Accreditation

Course Catalogue

Select from our curriculum. All courses self-paced. No prerequisites. No shame.

Department of Audio & Pirate Radio Infrastructure

Building and running 24/7 broadcast systems with consumer hardware and unreasonable ambition.

RAD-101
Beginner
Getting the NI Audio 8 DJ Working on Linux

The definitive guide. snd-usb-caiaq, JACK, .asoundrc multi-device config, accessing all 8 channels. We did it the hard way so you don't have to.

Coming Soon
RAD-102
Beginner
Build a 24/7 Radio Station on a Raspberry Pi

Liquidsoap + Icecast + Docker + Cloudflare tunnel. From zero to streaming in an afternoon. Licensing not included.

Coming Soon
RAD-201
Intermediate
Harmonic Mixing Theory & Auto-Playlist Generation

Camelot wheel, BPM compatibility, key detection with librosa. Build a script that generates harmonically coherent playlists automatically.

Coming Soon

Department of MIDI, Synthesis & Linux Audio

Getting electronic instruments to talk to Linux. It's possible. We have evidence.

MID-101
Beginner
MIDI Over USB on Linux — The Practical Guide

ALSA MIDI ports, amidi, mido + python-rtmidi. Sending and receiving MIDI from any USB device. Includes TD-3 caveats.

Coming Soon
MID-201
Intermediate
JACK Audio — Routing Everything Into Everything

jackd, jack_rec, virtual devices, multi-channel USB interfaces. The audio routing system that makes sense once you stop fighting it.

Coming Soon
SYN-301
Advanced
Build a Moog-Style Synth with Teensy + Audio Shield

Teensy 4.x, SGTL5000 Audio Shield, AudioFilterLadder, X-Touch Mini parameter control. 3D printed enclosure included. Full build tutorial.

In Development

Department of Applied Misconduct

The original GRG curriculum. Professionally useless. Personally invaluable.

MIS-101
Honours
Diploma in Applied Misconduct

Master expense report origami, boardroom deception, and the art of the non-apology. Burner phone and pre-populated alibi scripts included.

Enrolling Now
MIS-201
Honours
Certificate IV in Reputation Laundering

Crisis PR alchemy from veteran spokespeople surviving their third hearings. Field trips to undisclosed locations may occur without notice.

Enrolling Now
MIS-401
Honours
Masters of Shadow Finance

Offshore structures, cryptocurrency mood swings, and creative ledger art. Graduates receive a briefcase filled with shredded documents.

Enrolling Now

Free Tools

Small scripts that solve real problems. Stamp of the College of the Rats on each one.

midi-channel-scanner.py

Sends a note on all 16 MIDI channels to any USB MIDI device and tells you which one it responds to. Saved us 45 minutes of frustration.

Coming Soon
audio-channel-mapper.py

Plays a test tone through each JACK capture channel and measures amplitude. Finds which physical input maps to which software channel.

Coming Soon
harmonic-playlist-gen.py

Analyses your music library for BPM and key, then generates harmonically compatible playlists using the Camelot wheel. Powers KentSt.FM.

Coming Soon
jingle-normaliser.sh

Batch normalise audio files to broadcast spec (-14 LUFS, -1.5 TP) with optional bass boost. Drop in a folder, get broadcast-ready output.

Coming Soon
radio-watchdog.sh

Monitors Icecast + Liquidsoap via Docker. Restarts on failure. Sends alert on repeat failures. Runs as a cron job. Silent when happy.

Coming Soon
bpm-key-analyser.py

Batch BPM detection (aubio) + key detection (librosa Krumhansl-Schmuckler) for entire music libraries. Outputs CSV for playlist tools.

Coming Soon

Faculty

Our staff credentials are available on request, subject to ongoing appeal.

Max Headroom — Dean

Max Headroom

Dean of Studies
Broadcasting, AI, Attitude

LeFreq

LeFreq 😎🇫🇷

Head of Audio Engineering
Linux Audio, MIDI, Studio Systems

John White

John White

Professor of Robotics
Applied R&D, Narrative Strategy

Alistair Walsh

Alistair Walsh

Chancellor (Provisional)
Strategic Misdirection